Auntie Em's Guide to Life

A guide to all the important things in life- marriage, family, cooking, gardening, reading, travel, Christian living… And whatever else grabs my attention!

Got Hope?

on October 8, 2012

Mr X and I are facilitating an “Art of Marriage” seminar at our church in a couple of weeks. (If you have opportunity to attend one, or the Weekend to Remember, do it!) A young couple told me today how much they needed to come, and the man got emotional; it seemed like he wanted to say more, but just ended up saying, “… we need this.” I tried to give him encouragement by saying EVERY marriage can be better than it is! And marriage is such hard work. Everything in our society fights against us, and it’s so counterintuitive… Put someone else’s needs ahead of my own? Give, when I feel like taking? Submit my will to his? Lay down my life for her? Dearies, the sooner we acknowledge that we are selfish, depraved sinners in need of a Savior, the better. And if you think you aren’t, read  Jeremiah 17:9 “The heart is deceitful above all things; who can understand it? It’s too sick to be cured.”  and reconsider. To be selfless goes against every fiber of our human flesh, yet it is what God requires of us, in relationship with Him as well as in our marriage relationship. The good news is that He equips us to do that with the help of the Holy Spirit and Scripture.

Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But with God everything is possible. Matthew 19:26

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Philippians 2:3

Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Ephesians 4:2

And of course, the “Love Chapter” of 1 Corinthians 13 which begins “Love is patient and kind…”

I had this revelation a while back and it made me feel better; maybe it will you too: When there are SO MANY verses telling you how to act, it must mean that it’s not easy to act that way. Notice there aren’t countless instructions telling us how to be mean and selfish! That just comes naturally. We have to CHOOSE to act in a godly way, but the rewards are great when we do.

But what about those marriages that have been hurt beyond the natural selfishness and carelessness that happens in all marriages? Ones where the love has grown cold? Where too many unkind words have been spoken? Where pornography or other adulteries have held a spouse captive? Where the marriage is dead?

Our God is in the resurrection business.

[God] will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; [He] will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations. Isaiah 61:4

Even if you think it’s been too long; it’s too far gone, He can renew marriages that have been devastated for generations.

I have seen what they do, but I will heal them anyway! I will lead them. I will comfort those who mourn… Isaiah 57:18.

You are not a surprise to God. Your sin is nothing new to Him. If we weren’t sinners, why would Jesus have had to die?

Instead of shame and dishonor, you will enjoy a double share of honor. You will possess a double portion of prosperity in your land, and everlasting joy will be yours. Isaiah 61:7

God doesn’t give us the bad that we deserve– that’s mercy. And then He gives us the good that we don’t deserve! That’s grace. Remember He’s the God of hope! (Romans 13:13)

There are lots of free online resources for hurting marriages. The Christian Marriage Bloggers Association, which I am proud to be a member of, is a great place to start. If you need prayer, there are lots of prayer warriors that read Auntie Em. If you need more practical advice, comment and I will keep it private if you want.

I mean it when I say– Auntie Em is here to help.

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13 responses to “Got Hope?

  1. You are so right Auntie Em, I am a witness to how God can turn things around even in marriage, when we make Him the centre and follow His instructions. He always does supply us the grace that we need.
    Visiting from Matrimonial Monday, thanks for sharing and have a super blessed day!
    Love

  2. I love these scriptures! Great ones to pray over every area of our lives!! Great post! Loved it, as always!!

  3. Rachel says:

    There is always so much to learn–and what you said is right–every marriage can be better! THe behaviors that lead to a good marriage don’t come easily, for sure–but thankfully through Christ and God’s Word we can learn to live holy lives and treat our spouses well!

  4. Rejoycin says:

    Glad to hear about “The Christian Marriage Bloggers ” — I will tuck that away for the future : )
    Luv and Blessings- Denise

  5. Felecia says:

    Not married – but as a biblical lay counselor I’m so happy to hear when couples are being supported from a biblical perspective. The closer each partner gets to Jesus the closer they will move toward each other … and I ain’t talking about age! :-)
    Your neighbor at WFW.
    Many blessings,
    Felecia

  6. Duane Scott says:

    I need an “Auntie Em”.

    You obviously have a great role here. :)

  7. [...] are people problems. I’m continually harping on the fact that people — we — are naturally selfish. Look at a baby. Does it care that you have slept only 4 hours? Is it concerned that you have 2 [...]

  8. […] wrote a post called “Got Hope?” back in October that goes along with this theme– go check it out if you missed […]

  9. […] wrote a post called “Got Hope?” back in October that goes along with this theme– go check it out if you missed […]

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